No, subtlety is not communication. If something is important enough to you that the person you’re dating needs to know about it to keep you happy, make sure they actually know about it. Hints and clues can be fun sometimes, but not for important things. Just freaking say it. We really really don’t want to hear about your ex in the beginning, even if he is a great guy who you’re still friends with. This kind of conversation is much better had once the relationship is established. Don’t bash your ex if he was an asshole or something. Again, that’s something you can do later in the relationship. But during the initial dating portion, it just comes off as judgemental. We’ll be looking at how you talk about them and thinking of how you might talk about us behind our backs. Crocodile tears will get you what you want most of the time, but we know what’s happening. We’re simple, not stupid. It gets old really quick. When you suddenly become happy as a puppy once you get your way, we know you are being manipulative. Blond hair gains you many privileges in American society. The blonder and more bubbly you appear, the more privileges you will get. This happens in all interactions, big and small, online and offline. The prettier, blonder female will get treated nicer at Starbucks and be made head of the Communications department even if her writing is messy and grammatically incorrect. She’ll get tons of guys throwing themselves at her.
In contrast, a plainer, less blond, more ethnic person can smile at a Starbucks barista and still be treated worse than a pretty blond person making no effort to be nice. The less-blond, uglier person can be extremely intelligent, hard-working, meticulous, talented, well-read, and kind – and will toil away in low-paying back office jobs, never considered for executive jobs that blond, pretty people are given simply because people like their looks/vibe better. I had a friend whose boyfriend was doing this very thing. He loved her very much but was texting other girls regularly and sharing personal aspects of his life such as struggles and deep things like that. Cheating doesn’t start in the bedroom and isn’t limited to the bedroom. If you’re dating someone they’re your person you confide deep things in. If you’re texting another person of the same gender and confiding things in them then you’re cheating. This does not mean texting logistics or simple things like that. That’s just human communication. I’m talking late-night texting about personal issues. That’s not okay if you’ve got a significant other. Why not be honest and open with your significant other about communication with someone of the same gender. If you truly trust each other there won’t be drama but it can save you from temptation to be unfaithful. I wouldn’t want to hurt my husband by not being honest about texting another dude about what I should be talking to him about. so no, it’s not normal in my opinion.